
The charisma myth
by Olivia Fox Cabane, Olivia Cabane, Lisa Cordileone · first published 2012
65mentions
25recommended by
32HN commenters
2012–2026first – last mentioned
78% recommend19% neutral3% critical
Why HN recommends it
Treats charisma as a learnable set of behaviors rather than an innate trait, with practical exercises and techniques usable right away; suits people with social anxiety, shyness, or sales and leadership needs.
Summarised by Claude from recommending comments
Cabane breaks charisma down into its fundamental components, revealing the secrets to what charisma really is and how it works.
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…conveys a small fraction of what we are trying to say, the rest is all body language. Watch out about thinking too much of the meaning of what anyone has said to you. Highly recommend reading the book The Charisma Myth by Olivia Fox.
on “Masters of Love: Lasting relationships come down to kindness, generosity (2014)” ↗I just finished The Charisma Myth: http://www.amazon.com/Charisma-Myth-Science-Personal-Magneti... On audio book and immediately bought a physical copy. The book is filled with tips and tricks to increase your charisma that can be applied…
on “Ask HN: What are your best “soft skill” resources?” ↗The Charisma Myth by Olivia Fox-Cabane is pretty solid, but actually implementing the concepts in practice versus simply understanding them in theory is always the hard part. I used a combination of Anki flashcards and…
on “Ask HN: What books/activities do you recommended for being more charismatic?” ↗…Influence People. It's a quick read. It’s a very good book. However, for me personally, it was too advanced in the beginning. The book that really helped with first dealing with social anxiety was The Charisma Myth by Olivia Fox Cabane. It has a bunch of exercises that allow you to be present and become more social. To put it in perspective: The Charisma Myth tells you what to do and HTWFAIP tells you what to say.…
on “My three-year-old has taught me the value of talking to strangers” ↗The Charisma Myth is a very good book on charisma that goes into this in detail. The author, Olivia Fox Cabane, claims there are essentially three types of charisma: 1. Power 2. Presence 3. Warmth Power translates…
on “Why I Quit Being So Accommodating (1922)” ↗haha exactly in case anyone is interested in doing just that, http://www.amazon.com/The-Charisma-Myth-Personal-Magnetism/d...
on “The letter the Feds sent to Theranos [pdf]” ↗…come off to other people and maybe what went wrong in these interactions. If they were bad enough to warrant someone talking to HR then something definitely needs to change. I recommended the book " The Charisma Myth: How anyone can master the art and science of personal magnetism" by Olivia Fox Cabane. Additionally for the fellow commenters, Shame on anyone calling the accuser "mentally ill", "spreading gossip",…
on “Ask HN: Victim of an unfounded harrasement accusation. Your thoughts?” ↗…social anxiety. It helped me see how others saw me. Upon reading it, and taking its advice, at least one long-time friend mentioned to my wife at how much happier and friendlier I seemed lately. The Charisma Myth by Olivia Cabane.
on “Tricks to make yourself effortlessly charming” ↗…entertaining book on how Scott Adams failed and succeeded. He gives some practical tips on what he did to get to where he is. Of course, there is survivorship bias, but I found some of it helpful. The Charisma Myth: How Anyone Can Master the Art and Science of Personal Magnetism - People aren't born Charismatic. You can practice it. Never Split the Difference: Negotiating As If Your Life Depended On It - A book…
on “Ask HN: What was a book that changed your life?” ↗The E-Myth - creating systems and processes The Personal MBA - crash course MBA Founders At Work - understanding how different startups survived Buy Back Your Time - management and delegation The Charisma Myth - to help w/ charm for sales SPIN Selling - this + The Charisma Myth more than doubled our sales conversion rate These books were the most crucial for me
on “Ask HN: What books helped you in your entrepreneurship journey?” ↗Getting people to open up is a skill. It's also much easier to do with peers. Honestly, it's enough of a skill that I can't give you "quick pointers"-but check out the book The Charisma Myth, and pay special attention to Focus Charisma. That's the skill that you need to get people to open up about all their problems & concerns.
on “Why Quit? Because the other company has bigger monitors.” ↗The Bible How to win friends and influence people The Alchemist The Charisma Myth
on “What book has inspired you the most?” ↗…and then practicing a lot (which is also a big part of acquiring a lot of confidence). A very good book, with lots of exercises (that you should practice often if you really want to get better) is The Charisma Myth (http://www.amazon.com/Charisma-Myth-Science-Personal-Magneti...). Good luck in your learning journey!
on “Ask HN: How to talk smart?” ↗My two go-to books on the subject, very complementary to each other, are: - The charisma myth: http://www.amazon.com/The-Charisma-Myth-Personal-Magnetism/d... - Make your contacts count: http://www.amazon.com/Make-Your-Contacts-Count-Networking/dp...
on “Ask HN: What are your best “soft skill” resources?” ↗Presence: Bringing Your Boldest Self to Your Biggest by Amy Cuddy and The Charisma Myth: Master the Art of Personal Magnetism by Olivia Fox Cabane I really liked these books about how to be more influential in everyday life. These books provide simple techniques you can use right after…
on “Ask HN: Non-tech books that have helped you grow professionally?” ↗