The will to change
men, masculinity, and love
by bell hooks, Javier Saez, Marta Pera Cucurell · first published 2004
11mentions
6recommended by
7HN commenters
2019–2026first – last mentioned
86% recommend14% neutral
Why HN recommends it
Examines how patriarchy harms men emotionally and shapes masculinity, focusing on men's suffering and how boys learn to detach from feelings. A starting point for understanding gender and emotional life.
Summarised by Claude from recommending comments
bell hooks gibt in diesem Buch eine treffende Analyse patriarchaler Stereotypen von Männlichkeit und die Auswirkungen auf uns alle. Insbesondere ihre reflektierten und konstruktiven Ideen zu alternativen Männlichkeitsbildern regen zum Nachdenken an und eröffnen neue Sichtweisen.
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…Parents, teachers, peers, religious authorities, bosses, and advertising come to mind. I wonder where you'd rank the influence of all these? For reference, don't hesitate to look into bell hooks "The Will to Change;"[0] as feminist texts go, it's extremely sympathetic to men. I think you'll find a lot to agree with, right off the bat. 0. https://www.goodreads.com/book/show/17601.The_Will_to_Change
…it." Don't hesitate to read up on the ubiquity of "evil". I can get you started: 0. https://www.goodreads.com/book/show/224552.Why_Does_He_Do_Th... 1. https://www.goodreads.com/book/show/17601.The_Will_to_Change
on “Amazon VP Resigns, Calls Company ‘Chickenshit’ for Firing Protesting Workers” ↗…how quick you are to desire children's alienation from their feelings. Really, that's an atrocious desire. You should critically question that one. You should also consider reading bell hooks' "The Will to Change," which goes into great depth on the ways men like you and I are emotionally crippled--not coddled, crippled. At any rate, that's what you would do if you'd been "taught to critically question" your…
on “Anxiety and burnout: why kids are consumed with worry” ↗…agriculture, black workers in service work, and both groups are deprived of the high-pay, high-tech opportunities that white men like myself take for granted. In her indispensable feminist text, "The Will to Change", bell hooks uses the phrase “imperialist white-supremacist capitalist patriarchy” to describe the interlocking political systems that are the foundation of our nation’s politics.
on “Sex censorship killed the internet we love” ↗I highly recommend I Don’t Want To Talk About It by Terry Real or The Will To Change by bell hooks (which extensively cites the former) on this topic. We don’t talk enough about the harm patriarchy inflicts on boys and men through emotional neglect and detachment.
on “Ignoring Boys' Emotional Needs Fuels Public Health Risks” ↗Bell Hooks "The Will To Change" is as astounding body of work for folks who are interested in this further.
on “Ignoring Boys' Emotional Needs Fuels Public Health Risks” ↗Read bell hooks' "The Will to Change" to start. As someone on the far-left, we talk about positive masculinity all the time. The whole concept of intersectional feminism is that there are different classes of privilege and exploitation…
on “Boys and Men in the United States Are Struggling. The Left Should Talk About It” ↗This kind of hyper-masculine "men need to feel powerful" stuff is pure patriarchy. So much of this stuff is societal, not biological, and yet it's presented as truth. Highly recommend _The Will to Change: Men, Masculinity, and Love_ by bell hooks, if you're looking for a book about Men's suffering that actually looks at how men need to be cared for and loved. @watchfulcoyote on tiktok also has really…
on “Ugly psychology truths nobody wants to admit” ↗…of Red Pill) would parrot in their echo chamber of narcissism and hatred. If you want to make a real effort to understand humans and how the genders relate, expand your sources. A good starter: 'The Will to Change' by bell hooks
…about his feelings.” And the woman who can see the future says, “At two P.M. all over the world men will begin to talk about their feelings—and women all over the world will be sorry.” — bell hooks, The Will to Change
on “Men less likely than women to share negative information, says study” ↗…issue, and one that I believe neither side of the political spectrum (speaking in very broad strokes here) has addressed well at all. Where would you expect to see it addressed? bell hooks wrote The Will To Change more than twenty years ago.
on “Ask HN: How can we solve the loneliness epidemic?” ↗