
Self-Therapy
by Jay Earley · first published 2012
7mentions
6recommended by
7HN commenters
2015–2025first – last mentioned
86% recommend14% neutral
Why HN recommends it
Step-by-step guide to Internal Family Systems for working with your own inner parts; readers credit it with practical, non-simple solutions to motivation and self-conflict, useful with or without a therapist.
Summarised by Claude from recommending comments
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Another idea if you feel like you have multiple selves warring with each other to read Self-Therapy by Jay Earley. It talks about modeling the self not as one person but as a bunch of different agents, and how to get them to cooperate with one another. If that sounds familiar, you may want to get the…
on “Ask HN: How to give a shit about my idea” ↗I'm working with an IFS therapist. I haven't used that course. I am also reading Jay Earley's "Self-Therapy" book in conjunction, and that's been helpful.
on ““Multiple personality disorder” probably doesn't exist” ↗…trauma, when combined with other mind-body practices. There's a lot of videos with Richard Schwartz on Youtube explaining IFS: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=DdZZ7sTX840 There's also a book called "Self-Therapy" by Jay Earley that gives an approach for doing IFS on your own. Derek Scott has a great channel called IFSCA where he explains different IFS concepts - https://www.youtube.com/@IFSCA
on “How to Do Hard Things” ↗…Internal Family Systems made me more peaceful * "The Sleep Book" by Meadows made me sleep better * Apps: Otter for taking notes, Superhuman for email * Websites: Wirecutter * Books: How to Get Lucky, Self-Therapy
on “Ask HN: What things do you wish you discovered earlier?” ↗Self-Therapy by Jay Early was the first book I read that gave me lasting, "non-simple" solutions. Totally changed the way I view my own motivations, and shined a light on how absurd the "stop doing it"/"try harder"…
on “Cultivate the Skill of Undivided Attention, or “Deep Work” (2019)” ↗There is a form of therapy you can do by yourself called Internal Family Systems therapy. There are many books about doing self therapy but the one I was suggested was Self-Therapy: A Step-By-Step Guide to Creating Wholeness and Healing Your Inner Child Using IFS.
on “Ask HN: How do you tackle your own negativity?” ↗…Tulku Urgyen Rinpoche (if you don't have previous experience with Buddhism I'd recommend starting with something broader like Zen Mind Beginner's Mind, and find yourself a Buddhist meditation group!), and Self-Therapy by Jay Earley. Something else very much written for an intellectually-oriented audience but that gives inklings of a ladder into non-intellectual being, is Unwinding Anxiety by Judson A. Brewer. I liked…
on “Nine things I learned in ninety years” ↗