Modern Romance
by Aziz Ansari, Eric Klinenberg · first published 2015
50% recommend50% neutral
Why HN recommends it
Readable, entertaining look at how dating has changed, mixing Aziz Ansari's comedic voice with sociology and first-hand interviews; good for anyone who likes his standup or wants a light take on modern relationships.
Summarised by Claude from recommending comments
From NYU Wagner: At some point, every one of us embarks on a journey to find love. We meet people, date, get into and out of relationships, all with the hope of finding someone with whom we share a deep connection. This seems standard now, but it’s wildly different from what people did even just decades ago. Single people today have more romantic options than at any point in human history. With technology, our abilities to connect with and sort through these options are staggering. So why are so many people frustrated?
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For perspective on what dating and marriage choice used to be like decades ago, I recommend Aziz Ansari's "Modern Romance". I didn't expect it to be more than a joyread, but he wrote it in collaboration with a social psychology professor iirc, and went to great lengths to do first hand interviews with many people all over…
on “The Dramatically Different World of ’70s Dating Ads” ↗I just finished up Modern Romance by Aziz Ansari -- which, while not groundbreaking, was supremely interesting and readable. If you like Aziz's standup, it's basically him playing sociologist for 200 pages. Right now I'm going back…
on “Ask HN: What books are you reading?” ↗The Power of Habit - Charles Duhigg (highly recommended) Steve Jobs - Walter Isaacson (recommended) Modern Romance - Aziz Ansari (audiobook recommended) Boomerang - Michael Lewis (great if you have a light interest in macroeconomics) Elon Musk: Tesla, SpaceX, and the Quest for a Fantastic Future (recommended) Outliers…
on “Ask HN: Books you read in 2016?” ↗Modern Romance - Aziz Ansari
on “Ask HN: What are some of the great books on dating and relationship psychology?” ↗“Modern Romance” by Aziz Ansari is an interesting and entertaining read.
on “Ask HN: How should I find a wife?” ↗…before even considering the concept of love. I'm sure there's also studies that show repeated exposure of a person has a positive effect on their perception. And if you read the story in Aziz Ansari's Modern Romance, he mentions a similar anecdote where he met two Indian dudes, one who was struggling to meet anyone through online dating, and the other who exclusively just met women in real life and had no problems…
on “The Problem with Modern Romance Is Too Much Choice” ↗…the instructors and most of my cohort, and writing anything negative seems impolite - not wanting to hurt someone's feelings or seem ungrateful. Irrational, but there ya go. I was reading Aziz Ansari's Modern Romance. In each of his shows for a tour, he polled the audience with two questions. How should you let a person who is interested in you know you aren't interested in them: Pretend to be busy, say nothing,…
on “Ask HN: Why are there so few reviews for coding bootcamps?” ↗- Modern Romance: An Investigation by Aziz Ansari - The Defining Decade: Why Your Twenties Matter by Meg Jay - The Like Switch: An Ex-FBI Agent’s Guide to Influencing, Attracting, and Winning People Over by Jack Schafer…
on “Ask HN: Books you read in 2016?” ↗…to me how hard it is to be hired and at the same time how many folks are "hiring". I wonder whether the Aziz Ansari issues around dating have spread to the startup world: http://time.com/aziz-ansari-modern-romance/ Maybe managers aren't satisficing any more?
on “Ask HN: Startup to enterprise and back to startups – how?” ↗…other to have their backs, since if things go badly for your partner, they go badly for you and vice-versa. Plus, you'll be counting on them in 50 years, so if you're not there for them now... Refs: Modern Romance by Aziz Ansari. But there is a more general aspect that parents can objectively evaluate compatibility and quality of your partner in a way that you can't. Again, it's worth noting there's a scale here.…
on “More than half of 18 to 29-year-olds in the US are living with parents” ↗…Ralph Ellison Unfuk Yourself by Gary John Bishop The Alchemist by Paulo Coelho Iron John by Robert Bly The Call of the Wild and White Fang by Jack London Treasure Island by Robert Louis Stevenson Modern Romance by Aziz Ansari White Teeth by Zadie Smith Atlas Shrugged by Ayn Rand Men Are from Mars, Women Are from Venus by John Gray Moby Dick by Herman Melville
on “Show HN: I've compiled a list of the top books for men according to 56 blogs” ↗