I Hate You - Don't Leave Me
by Jerold J. Kreisman · first published 1989
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2017–2024first – last mentioned
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The revised and expanded third edition of the best-selling guide to understanding borderline personality disorder - with advice for communicating with and helping the borderline individuals in your life. After more than three decades as the essential guide to borderline personality disorder (BPD), the third edition of I Hate You - Don’t Leave Me now reflects the most up-to-date research that has opened doors to the neurobiological, genetic, and developmental roots of the disorder, as well as connections between BPD and substance abuse, sexual abuse, post-traumatic stress syndrome, ADHD, and
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…traced to childhood abandonment; whether it's losing parents, moving countries, or a troublesome upbringing. If any of this sounds like you, I'd suggest looking more into BPD. There's a book called "I hate you, don't leave me"; that while not perfect and critiqued in some areas, is a great explanation of BPD. But also, don't self-diagnose; don't think you have BPD just because you want to quit.
on “Don’t Quit When It Gets Hard” ↗The book I Hate You - Don't Leave Me helped me a lot, especially the SET communication skills. Learning DBT skills (The Dialectical Behavior Therapy Handbook) helped me a lot too especially emotional regulation. Having an amazing therapist…
on “When Do We Have Empathy for the Mentally Ill?” ↗…strong and triggering leave for later. cptsd is relevant to attachment problems but not directly. let me also add another tangentially relevant but very good book about borderline personality disorder "I hate you, don't leave me' After someone has realized that not knowing why he dislikes all his partners for no reason after while is due to trauma healing can start. It takes 3-5 years of therapy and a secure partner through…
on “The Effects of Early Relational Trauma (2001) [pdf]” ↗If people get one thing and only one from this thread, it should be this: the vast majority of popular work on BPD (e.g., Stop Walking on Eggshells, mentioned below, and "I hate you, don't leave me", etc.) is based on research that is decades out of date and substantially obsolete. If you want to learn about BPD, start with the research on Dialectical Behavior Therapy [0] and grow from there. Before…
on “Borderline Personality Disorder: Treatment Resistance Reconsidered” ↗